Last week, I wrote an article about the “Ice Monster” prologue, which is one tactic that you might employ in order to hook your readers. I took a trip up to my hometown of Dallas shortly after writing this. During the drive, I listened to an audiobook of a classic middle grade novel that I never read growing up: The Giver by Lois Lowry.
With hooks on the mind, I paid special attention to how this book opens. The first passage of the book is almost entirely navel-gazing. Jonas spends the whole passage trying to find the right word for how he feels about an approaching event, and he eventually settles on the word “apprehensive.” In that time, we also get a little bit of world-building, as Jonas remembers the passing of a plane over his strange, dystopian community.
Typically, I would say that opening a book with a passage devoted entirely to navel-gazing–that is, a character’s thoughts and feelings–would be a bad idea. A better hook would come in the form of action. Not necessarily an action sequence with swords or blasters, but a character taking action. Events unfolding before us in real time that tell us about the character and the world.
Nonetheless, The Giver‘s navel-gazey opening worked for me. Why?
We begin with Jonas feeling frightened. Now, I want to know why he feels that way. My curiosity is piqued. I want to know what this book is about, so I’m not going to put down the book until I find out what’s causing Jonas’s fright. Unless, of course, the book doesn’t tell me in a timely manner. Lowry has bought herself some of my attention with her opening line.
Fortunately, she tells us why Jonas feels frightened (“No,” he realizes, “apprehensive.”) in the first few pages, by the time we get to the first page break. A special December is approaching for him and all of the other eleven-year-olds in the community. Again, I’m interested. What upcoming event would make this December so special, and why would it cause Jonas such apprehension?
Again, Lowry tells us in a timely manner. The “Ceremony of Twelve” is approaching, where all of the children in Jonas’s year will be assigned to the jobs that they’ll work for the rest of their life. Jonas has no idea what sort of job he’ll be assigned to, but since we’re reading a book about him, we know that it likely won’t be any ordinary job.
The Giver has twenty-three chapters. But the Ceremony of Twelve doesn’t happen until chapter seven. That’s nearly a third of the way through the book! How does Lowry hold her readers’ attention with her inciting incident so far into her novel?
She does so by building our apprehension. We begin to feel the same apprehension that Jonas feels. By repeatedly referencing a big, upcoming event shrouded in mystery, she builds our curiosity. And by repeatedly foreshadowing that things may go wrong at this event, she builds suspense. She guarantees that we’ll read her novel until we see the Ceremony. And once you’re a third of the way through any book, you’re far less likely to put it down. By building apprehension, she buys herself time. And once that time is spent, you’re invested in her novel.
So how can you apply this to your own writing? Well, not every tactic for hooking your reader will work for every novel. For example, the “Ice Monster” prologue would have felt very strange in a book like The Giver. But if your characters can know that the inciting incident is approaching, and if they have some inkling that something might go wrong, you can play into that. Shroud your inciting incident in just enough mystery to pique curiosity, but grant bits and pieces of information to reward your audience for reading on. Foreshadow how the incident may not go as planned.
In doing so, you’ll buy valuable time to introduce your readers to setting and character. By the time you answer their biggest questions, you’ll have them invested enough in your story. They won’t be able to help but finish reading.
– AJG
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