“Put out the closest fire first.”
That’s what my mom tells me when I’m feeling overwhelmed. I don’t know if it’s good practice for firefighters, but it’s sage advice otherwise.
In a nation where wages don’t keep up with inflation, the job market grows more competitive by the day, and political systems feel broken beyond repair, it’s easy to want to throw in the towel. Even on a more myopic level, the stress of paying bills, doing house chores, going to work, getting sleep, finding time to relax, and maintaining a social life can feel debilitating. But you’ve made it through every period of stress in your life so far. And when you’re on the other side of the problem, it doesn’t seem so bad.
How can we make it seem less bad on the front side of things? When projects are looming overhead, how can we remain calm and see life’s struggles for what they are–surmountable?
Put out the closest fire first. Focus on the problem at hand, and take care of it. Then, move on to the next one. Rather than focusing on the whole scope of the situation, break it down piecemeal. Do you feel like this school year will never end? Don’t focus on getting through the year. Get through the day. Do you wish you were more well-read? Don’t focus on all the books you haven’t opened. Finish one chapter of one book. Do you feel like your book will never get written? Don’t focus on writing the book. Write a page.
Finding a career in writing takes consistent time and effort over the course of years. You have to write a lot of bad stories before you figure out how to write a good one. That barrier to entry is enough to scare away a lot of would-be authors. And the constant grind, the constant doubt, is enough to discourage those who are almost there. The key to staving off hopelessness is focusing on the day-to-day rather than the broad scope.
I’ve not mastered this present-minded thinking at all; I’ve struggled with it my whole life. I’m an anxious person. And I’m writing this article as much to share wisdom as a reminder for myself.
I’ve been in my own head a lot lately. Thinking about my desired future and how much I need to do to get there. Thinking about all that’s uncertain between then and now. And I’m reminded of another time I was stuck in my own head.
I once vacationed to Colorado with close friends. On paper, we had a wonderful experience. But due to unfortunate developments in my personal life, I was often preoccupied. One day, we sat on a lovely outdoor patio with a gorgeous view. And as I ate my meal, I agonized over the future for the millionth time. Over what decisions I could make and what paths they would lead me down. I agonized to the point where it was unhelpful.
A friend of mine listened politely, and when I was done, he said, “This is going to sound harsh, but I mean this in the most loving way. We’re on vacation. You need to shut up and look at the mountains.”
So remember to shut up and look at the mountains. Put out the closest fire first. And take life “bird by bird.”
– AJG
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